The year has just begun and the word I see being thrown around a lot is ‘new.’ New meaning a change from the usual, a turn from the old. I’d like to assume that the change to be desired is a positive one and that’s what the topic of intrapersonality is about..somehow.

Intrapersonality is a word I’ve made up from the phrase intrapersonal communication that means communicating within oneself. Intrapersonality is that dominant voice within yourself. Inherently there is more than one voice or thought when making a decision and the one we tend to listen to most forms our intrapersonality. The stronger and more goal-oriented your intrapersonality, the better for you.

Don’t worry, it will get clearer as we move along.

The most limiting factor to one’s success is oneself. Yes there are environmental factors such as finances, physical constraints and all that but one can still have the required resources and not reach their goals- that’s only because of themselves. That’s why people get amazed when a man with no limbs starts swimming  or someone underprivileged achieves success that was unexpected: they didn’t have the physical resources required to achieve what they did but they still did it. This shows that there is a resource that we all have yet few of us exploit and that is ourselves. I firmly believe that having a strong intrapersonality is one of the best, if not the best, ways of tapping into this resource.

Think of it this way. A student wants to do an assignment or an employee has a report to hand in and they are using the internet for research. In this day and age it is not uncommon to find someone drifting off into websites such as Facebook, YouTube or even WordPress and completely being distracted from the task at hand. I myself had to fight my way through two other sites before I finally began writing this blog.

The only one at fault here is the student or the employee. They made a conscious decision to go and to stay in these websites. To stop being distracted all they have to do is to close the webpages. That’s easier said than done and this is where intrapersonality comes in. They themselves know that they’re supposed to be working and have that voice inside their heads as a constant reminder. They’re having a conversation at the back of their minds on whether they should go on or not. Resultantly, the more convincing or ‘stronger’ voice wins.

It may seem that the decision leading to that distraction is unconscious or automatic. Making the choice to go to that website is a decision that went through one’s mind, so is the decision to remain there. The constant listening to the negative voice is what made it so strong that one feels that they can’t help it anymore.

I now believe that you have a hint to what I’m talking about. What we have to do is simply make sure that the ‘sane’ voice, the voice telling us to go back to work, to stop that bad habit, not to procrastinate, that we don’t have to stay in bed for five more minutes, that we don’t have to watch one more episode.. we have to make sure that voice wins. All those little rules and little laws we set for ourselves aren’t set in stone- we are the governing bodies, just as we set them we can change or break them. The sooner you realize that you are the greatest enemy to your own progress the sooner you can start progressing.

We now know who and what the problem is , the how is what I want to highlight. It’s very simple. In forming your intapersonality, there are opposing voices, and once you have established them, feed the side in line with your goal.

An example. It’s morning. You had planned to go jogging. You start having that conversation of whether you should leave bed or stay. Both sides will have seemingly valid arguments but you will tend to give one side more preference and that side will next time be stronger. What you want to do is consciously choose the side that’ll help accomplish your goal. Once you make that conscious decision the first time then it will be subsequently easier. Once you get out of bed once, it will be easier the next time. What you are doing  in very simplistic terms is feeding the side in line with your goal and making your intrapersonality more positively oriented.

Making that conscious decision will give yourself an advantage with future conversations, it will make the discussion shorter and more effective. This will turn negative decisions and habits into positive ones. Once you win the war within yourself you will be better placed to battle the wars of life.

So make a conscious decision to positively strengthen your intrapersonality and don’t let the calendar be the only thing that changes this year.