This life has a lot of ups and downs and it may seem that the downs are more but that isn’t really the case. It just that we don’t consider most of the ups and emphasize on the negative. Its human nature.
Another not so good part of human nature is the difficulty in accepting the pitfalls in life, keeping on focusing on those negative occurrences and letting them eat us up and affect our present and future negatively. We choose to be burdened by what we could have done to make it better, how we could have acted, constantly reminding ourselves of our failures and denying ourselves future victories.
This all comes down to how we perceive the situations we are in and how we react to them.
Lets say you are a student and you have one hour to read forty pages, or maybe even two hours before that test or examination. My experience with other people experiencing these or similar situations is that they will use most of the time lamenting of how they should have read and how they can’t finish reading in time. All this anxiety they are harboring can be averted when you accept the situation that yes, you haven’t read, you can’t change the past, what you can do is make the most of your present so as to positively affect your future.
The example above was just an example of many situations in life that we let “get to us”. Another example is someone who has invested into a venture. Maybe you have a farm and you have worked and toiled but the rains don’t come or your farm gets attacked by pests. There are two reactions to this. The farmer could give up or blame the heavens for not producing rain, and nature for bringing pests but that wont change anything. It will only add negativity to the situation. The farmer could also analyse the situation, accept it and learn from it by ensuring that there’s enough pesticide and a water irrigation system next planting season.
The best thing we can do with failure is learn from it. Blaming yourself or others is only beneficial if it will help you turn around that certain negative aspect about you. If whatever action you take after a problem occurs will not have a positive impact then it is nothing but a waste of time or another problem.
Think of life decisions as fruit on a tree. You have the choice of choosing the fruit, you make the effort to pick it. You however do not have the power to make it sweet or bitter, yes it may have looked ripe and juicy but beyond your perception the taste of the fruit is up to the tree and if the fruit is bitter you may get bitter and throw away the seeds thus wasting them or you may go plant them somewhere else and give rise to other fruits some sweet some bitter.
The same applies to life. Yes you make a decision, you put effort into it but the outcome may or may not be what you expect and whether or not you like it you will have to live with it.The only thing that we have control over the outcome is where we go after we die and that is my Christian viewpoint. All these other things in life we can just give our all, pray to God and hope for the best. The sooner we realize that we are the ones who make our life so hard the sooner we can change it. Its not easy but its not impossible either.